zacks_senario1 (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} zacks_senario1) wrote,@ 2006-09-14 14:35:00 |
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The Ways
I'm finally begining to except that the only ways the world works are the fucked up ways. My post 3 days ago plays quite the role in that theory. Also the given fact that I got another October on it's way, so I need as much solitude as I can get. I need all to remember that on October 23rd, don't call me or talk to me, because every year that is always the day I need to be left alone. If you don't know where I am or haven't heard from me, don't worry about me I'll be fine.
Although there was some angry exageration, I do still mean everything that I said in the post 3 days ago. But the fact is, what's going on between them is not my heart to be broken, so I really shouldn't give a fuck in that area. The problem being, I don't have any secrets of my own, so the minute I have to keep a secret for you when I find it fucked up to begin w/, I lose the will to be a good person. But losing my best friends is prolly the one thing that would break my heart.
I guess that's just where I differ from the other fans of e2e, I don't kiss their asses. When I praise them, that's how I feel, when I lose respect for someone, I say so. If I think they sound like Chareles Manson and it freaks me out, I don't go saying how cool it is just because one of them said it, I say how fucked up it is. Fact is, I love everyone I've known for the past year and I really don't want things to change.
I know what I said when about fred and Salina at the end of the post, and I chances are took it further than I mean. I still admire Fred as a musician, and I wouldn't say that I want "nothing" to do w/ Salina. I just think I'm gonna need to miss them for awhile. But I don't care to hear anyone elses side of the story, because like I said, it's non of my business.
As far as October 23rd goes, anyone who knows me well could tell you why and they have my permission if you want to know. Sure I had 7 years to get over it, but it's not everyday you find out that your unborn child was involved as well. So just give me my day to not exist, and don't think about me.
I'm finally begining to except that the only ways the world works are the fucked up ways. My post 3 days ago plays quite the role in that theory. Also the given fact that I got another October on it's way, so I need as much solitude as I can get. I need all to remember that on October 23rd, don't call me or talk to me, because every year that is always the day I need to be left alone. If you don't know where I am or haven't heard from me, don't worry about me I'll be fine.
Although there was some angry exageration, I do still mean everything that I said in the post 3 days ago. But the fact is, what's going on between them is not my heart to be broken, so I really shouldn't give a fuck in that area. The problem being, I don't have any secrets of my own, so the minute I have to keep a secret for you when I find it fucked up to begin w/, I lose the will to be a good person. But losing my best friends is prolly the one thing that would break my heart.
I guess that's just where I differ from the other fans of e2e, I don't kiss their asses. When I praise them, that's how I feel, when I lose respect for someone, I say so. If I think they sound like Chareles Manson and it freaks me out, I don't go saying how cool it is just because one of them said it, I say how fucked up it is. Fact is, I love everyone I've known for the past year and I really don't want things to change.
I know what I said when about fred and Salina at the end of the post, and I chances are took it further than I mean. I still admire Fred as a musician, and I wouldn't say that I want "nothing" to do w/ Salina. I just think I'm gonna need to miss them for awhile. But I don't care to hear anyone elses side of the story, because like I said, it's non of my business.
As far as October 23rd goes, anyone who knows me well could tell you why and they have my permission if you want to know. Sure I had 7 years to get over it, but it's not everyday you find out that your unborn child was involved as well. So just give me my day to not exist, and don't think about me.
